Changing, And I Don’t Know Why

Well, after some of you have been on pins and needles, here’s an adoption update. True to our story thus far, it’s a bittersweet update.

 

At the beginning of July we received news that the Chinese adoption authority, the CCCWA (China Center for Children’s Welfare and Adoption), changed the eligibility requirements for adoption. This we knew. A few of the changes put us in a grey area, where we didn’t know if were still eligible or not, and so our wonderful case worker at our phenomenal agency told us to sit tight, as they were taking every.single.case.in.their.China.program to the CCCWA to see if any of them could be “grandfathered in” to the process. I don’t even pretend to know how many families that included, but off the top of my head I knew 3 others who weren’t matched yet, so I imagined it was at least a couple dozen. Roughly three weeks later, on our way home from our beach trip, we got the call- China did not consider us eligible. We had been preparing for that news, but cuss, it still hurt.

 

Lots of emotions and conversations and therapy sessions and prayers and option-researching later (I’ll spare y’all this part), we decided to go on hold for our China child, until we are again eligible. We could have changed programs within our agency and moved on to a different country. We could have gone back to domestic infant adoption. We could have walked away from it altogether. But ultimately, we KNOW we are called to adopt, and feel strongly that it was supposed to have been from China all along. We don’t want to “force” it into happening, and switching back to domestic or changing countries felt like we were trying to control the situation. So, we will go on hold with our agency, and check back in regularly for when we are deemed eligible, and they will waive the reinstatement fees for us since no one saw this coming. (Bless them for this!)

 

It’s been hard the last two weeks especially because two dear friends have been matched with their sweet Chinese sons. We are so happy for them, and cannot wait to watch their precious families welcome their new additions, but I would be remiss to not say it’s a little painful for my tender heart. (If y’all are reading this, we cannot be more excited for your families, and hope you know that we say that with sincere and celebratory hearts! We are praying for your sons, for the last pieces of your journey to fall into place without a hitch, and for the transition home to siblings and awesome parents to be as smooth as possible! We are praying for God to start the restoration and healing in their little hearts and bodies now, and continue it from the moment you hold them in your arms and bring them home. <3 )

 

So where does that leave us? Well, we have been back and forth about this concept for years, but finally feel like we are on the same page and feel the same push. We have started the process to be an approved foster family, so that we can respond to the needs of children right here in our own community. We may not be able to bring our adopted son or daughter home forever right now, but our home does have space and our hearts are open to love and care for a child that may only need us for a season. We have to start another homestudy from scratch, so it’s going to be another 6-8 months before we are approved, but that gives us time to heal and recover and check in with our agency in a non-pressure way. We may just provide respite care or babysitting, but again, we want to do for one child in need what we wish we could do for all– provide consistent love and tender care for as long as that child is in our home.

 

Our adoption fundraising thus far will remain intact and in our designated adoption savings account for when we are eligible for China again. I am still painting verses and lyrics and names and whatnot as a fundraiser, so hit me up if you need something painted! Or check out Barefoot Evergreen Collective for ready-made pieces. But that money goes directly into the adoption savings, separate and accounted for, as do any other gifts or donations. If you have ANY questions at all about this, please contact myself or Husbeast and we will definitely help however we can.

 

We have been blown away by our friends and family in their generosity and prayers, and continue to be humbled by your support. This isn’t a change we expected, but now that it’s done and decided we have peace about the hold, peace about pursuing fostering, and peace about where God is taking us. We don’t know why this has been such a strange journey, or what purpose all of these changes have in the end story, but we’re ok with not knowing right now, also. We’ll keep you posted here when there are updates to be had, but for now, look forward to more family-oriented updates and vet-related posts!

 

I felt like a gratuitous happy family photo was needed.

 

You’re aching, you’re breaking/ And I can see the pain in your eyes/ Says everybody’s changing/ And I don’t know why -Keane

 

Grace and Peace,

Stevie

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